Monday, December 13, 2010

Now a Mother

It’s that hideous hospital odor. It makes my heart race. I feel faint. There is also that metallic aluminum smell. When will it be over? Sweat and pain. It’s endless. I smell everyone’s agitation. The nurses smell horrid, even my own perspiration stenches. I don’t want anyone to touch me. I am scared and tired. When will it be over? I hate the starchy sanitized towel they give me to wipe my face with. I am screaming so loud because of the pain. I never knew my voice could be so irritatingly shrill. I am surrounded now by strangers. I can taste a nauseating smell, I cannot escape it, and it’s coming from me. It’s my body straining, changing and transforming. I am no longer a girl, I have transformed. I am now a mother.

1 comment:

  1. It is all worth it though, isn't it?
    What an auspicious time to have a baby! Congratulations.

    Hope you are somehow, someway managing to get some sleep.